The Link Between Self-love, Confidence & Pole Dancing

– Article By Kati H

A spinning metal apparatus…not something you’d initially link with self-love, but for thousands of people all over the world (including myself), it offered exactly that. This is because true self-love goes much deeper than a surface-level skincare routine or eating well. Although these things are important, they don’t allow for us to really get to know ourselves, or offer us the chance to discover our inner strength and confidence.

The truth about finding self-love and confidence

Pole dancing gives us a unique opportunity to transform us from who we thought we were, to who we have the ability to become. It take us to the depths of ourselves because it’s hard work! Self love doesn’t come from lying in a bubble bath telling ourselves how fabulous we are. It develops through discipline and taking consistent action that challenges us to grow. We need to show, not tell ourselves how amazing and confident we are!

Personal growth through pole

Pole gives us insight that I don’t believe any other “fitness” regime can offer. I’m proud to say I’ve been a part of the pole industry for 13 and a half years. It has grown and evolved so much in that time, and I know it will continue to. There will always be a new trick to learn, a new dance style created (and new heels to buy!) and this keeps us growing and evolving with it, while keeping us humble.

Every single time we attend a pole, flexibility or dance class, we are showing ourselves love. We are doing something good for our bodies, mind and soul, and the best thing about it…it’s fun! So we genuinely want to show up, learn, and build confidence. That doesn’t mean we never have our off-days. It’s all a natural part of the process!

Being in feel-good environment

But it’s in those moments we get to choose how we show up for ourselves. We pole dancers can often be so hard on ourselves, falling prey to comparison over our fellow polers or our Instagram idols, but then we remember why we started…because we LOVE it and because it makes us feel good on the inside. And if that’s not enough to get us through our momentary struggle, then that’s when our Tribe shows up to offer guidance and support. Nobody is 100% immune to the inner critic, so this is when we can be grateful to be in a class with pumping tunes and laughter to drown out the self doubts when they creep in.

Pole has taught me so much about myself. It’s made me stronger than I could have ever dreamed (and not just physically), and it’s helped me accept and love myself fully – all while feeling confident and sexy AF in my 8″ heels! And I know it can do the same for you.

Kati has been pole-ing for over a decade and is favourited by students for her flowy, graceful style. She is also a Self Love Coach, and yoga teacher who has a focus on helping women bring out their inner strengths. View her profile to learn more and book a private, 1-on-1 lesson.

If you’re ready to conquer confidence, and take control of the beliefs that have held you back from being the boldest version of you, make a visit to The Pole Room. Classes are fun, relaxed and totally beginner-friendly. Even if you feel un-co, or have never set foot in a dance studio in your life, you’ll be in the hands of instructors who will work with you to become your best self. Click here to get started!

Confidence: It Starts From These 4 Places

Let’s be real. All of us have moments where we catch ourselves standing in front of the mirror, criticising what we see. Whether it’s our facial features, our body types, or even the number on the scale, we find ourselves in constant battles of wanting what we don’t have. When we’re not comfortable in our own skin, it stops us from living to the full. We make excuses to skip social activities, we keep our cameras off in Zoom meetings, and we tell ourselves we can’t wear certain clothes because we’re “too this” or “too that”.

If you catch yourself see-sawing with self-doubt and self-esteem, I hear you, GF! I’ve certainly been guilty of letting reality TV determine how I’ve felt about myself. Body love is an ongoing journey, and as a mum with 2 kids, I can tell you it’s something I work towards every day.

So how do we stop the media from setting the benchmark on how we feel about ourselves? How do we gain the confidence to feel deserving, own the spotlight, and take advantage of the opportunities that come our way? Everyone navigates their own path, but throughout my mission to be a positive-body role model for my kids, I’ve learnt to do the following 4 things to help remind myself that every-body is worth loving.

1. Owning your top traits

Start each day by counting 3 things that you’re grateful for. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has things about themselves that are worth celebrating. It may be a quality about yourself, or feature that you like. Big or small, bringing awareness to your strengths is a great way to put your #BossVibes on.

2. Celebrating what makes you, YOU

I once had a dance teacher who taught me a very important lesson…She said “everyone has their weaknesses. Instead of hiding them, embrace them! Make them work for YOU.” There are always going to be niggly things about ourselves that we want to change. Instead of thinking we need to fit a certain profile or look like the next trending influencer, we need to show up and give credit to these things that give us character…because that boldness is attractive!

3. Harnessing the power of positive self talk

Words are a powerful thing. Try this: For a whole day, pay close attention to your language and self talk. Do you catch yourself beating yourself up or using limiting words? Turn it right around! For example, instead of saying “I hate that I no longer fit into my high school jeans”, say “I love the fact I can indulge, enjoy myself on weekends, and have a wardrobe that flaunts my sensuality!”

4. Spending time in a community that loves you back

They say it takes a village to raise a child. I’m going to say it takes a Tribe to teach the art of self-love! Developing self empowerment is one thing, but to have a community that celebrates belongingness, freedom of self expression and diversity, is a big part of filtering out negative chatter. That’s exactly what I found with The Pole Room. It’s the one place where I’m focussed on what my body is capable of. Because when I’m doing tricks, dancing it out, and being cheered on by a room full of uplifting souls, there’s no second-guessing who I am and what I can achieve.

If you’re ready to conquer confidence and take control of the beliefs that have held you back from being the boldest version of you, make a visit to The Pole Room. Classes are fun, relaxed and totally beginner-friendly. Even if you feel un-co, or have never set foot in a dance studio in your life, you’ll be in the hands of instructors who will work with you to become your best self.  Click here to get started!

– Article By Shanae D

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